We See You
By Rose
Today’s post comes from Rose (she/her), a cis, white English-Language Arts teacher on unceded Paiute and Shoshone land, who loves learning with her students and works hard to ensure that everyone in her classroom gets the opportunity to see themselves and learn about others in the books she chooses to teach. We know that we said that Jill would be writing about small things this week, but it’s been a week and Rose was ready. A BIG thing–filling in for someone when they can’t quite get themselves together.
For the last several years, I have found myself in the company of many parents and grandparents 2SLGBTQIA+ teens. Some of them struggle with wrapping their minds around what they perceive as new identities. While these identities have always existed, because of a history of marginalization, not everyone had the benefit of learning about these communities and people. The parents and grandparents I have spoken to about this are the ones who want to do the work and figure out how to support their teens without putting all the responsibility on their teens to be their teachers. If this is you or someone you love, you’re in luck! Science tells us that one (fantastic) way to build empathy is to read fiction (nerd out reading about it here). And there is a wealth of #ownvoices 2SLGBTQIA+ literature out there these days, especially in the YA (young adult) fiction world. AND I would love to recommend some of my favorites. Maybe one of these books could be an inroad to a conversation with a teenager in your life or a peer who could also use a helping hand building understanding. Story is so powerful and I am constantly in a state of gratitude for all the storytellers out there who give me hours of almost-lived experience different from my own.
An oldie but a goodie and one that really helped me is Juliet Takes a Breath by Gabby Rivera. There were so many good lines, so many great scenes, and I really felt a connection with Juliet despite having quite a different identity. It brought me right back to that late-teen/early-twenties time in my life when I was trying to figure out who I was, what I valued, and what I wanted to work toward my life becoming. I also really appreciated the way that she dealt with intersectionality and calling out white privilege; the white feminist gave a helpful non-example and it gave us white people a window into the conversation that happened without our hampering presence. Please comment below: what is a standout book that helped you learn?
Quick notes and reminders:
1) Please (if you can) support your local independent bookstore or library with your reading choices.
2) If you don’t have a local indy bookstore, Bookshop.org lets you choose an indy bookstore to support and recently launched e-books so you have an alternative supporting a billionaire even if e-books are your preference.
3) Audiobooks are just reading with your ears and Libro.fm is an audiobook app that lets you choose an independent bookstore to support with each purchase.
List of book suggestions:
(Because I am a super-nerd, Each book title comes with a bunch of resources to go with it, enjoy! The Thinglink resources provided are interactive images that bring together source materials, images, documents, and personal commentary. Easy and fun, I promise!)
Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas
Under the Udala Trees by Chinelo Okparanta
King and the Dragonflies by Kacen Callender
The House You Pass Along the Way by Jaqueline Woodson
Running list of graphic novel recommendations
Not YA but one of my absolute favorite books is 10 Minutes and 38 Seconds in this Strange World by Elif Shafak. (The resources are still in progress.)
ONE SMALL THING
Pick up one of the books above or something that you’ve been meaning to read, or even ask a teen in your life what they are reading and join them in the journey.
Spot for Support
We love that Rose’s post came just in time for Banned Books Week. Great places to support right now are queer owned independent bookstores. We found this list if you don’t know of one. Jill’s first favorite bookstore, one of the oldest feminist bookstores in the country, whose current ownership she is not aware of, but that at one time WAS a queer owned bookstore is not on this list. Check out Charis Books and More (in Atlanta) online or, if you can, in person.
In the comments:
What are your favorite banned or queer books? What of Rose’s suggestions are you going to read? Let us know! Do you have a favorite queer owned bookstore? Share the link with us.
Have a favorite YA or children’s book with queer or trans topics or protagonists? We’d love to publish your review! This form is a guide.
Next week: We’ll share a post about small things you can do to support queer and trans youth. Are you an ally or co-conspirator? Parent or teacher to queer or trans youth? Send us an email @thebannedresistance@gmail.com and share the small everyday things you do. Are you queer or trans? What’s a small thing that has made a big difference in your life?
Years and years ago, I read "If I Was Your Girl" by Meredith Russo, and along with getting some insight into the lived experience of navigating the world as a trans teen girl, there was a scene where she walks in on her mom late at night. The mom is sitting in the living room crying softly with family photo albums spread out with pictures of the protagonist before her transition. And the mother tells her, it's not about you being trans, this isn't the first time you've grown out of a life stage, and I've mourned the loss of that younger version of you. It doesn't mean I don't 100% love the version of you that is here now.
And I just felt that was such a compassionate and true take on some complex emotions that come as a parent.